Family Roles

 Have you ever thought about how every person in your family plays a vital role and without one of them and their position, your family would fall apart and be completely different? I haven't until this week, but it's so true. There is a total of five kids in my immediate family and i've realized that we each play a different role due to our personalities and because of our birth order. For example, my oldest sister is the leader of the pack. She organizes a lot of things and keeps up with everyone even though she has her own family to tend to. She's the one that most of us go to if we're in a state of a listening ear or have a difficult problem we need to logically and emotionally think through. My second oldest sister is the peacemaker in the family. She makes everyone feel good about themselves. She just has this glow about her where people can't help but feel happy. She has this smile and laugh that is so contagious that can change a bad mood into a happy one in seconds. She's one I go to to just feel relaxed as she doesn't like confrontation or drama. Then there's my oldest brother who's the character of the family. He's obsessed with building and fixing things, whether that's with tangible supplies or a broken heart. He's a good brother to talk to about logical things as he has a bright mind and a go getter attitude. He's someone that empowers you to be better, to fight through something hard and to not stay discouraged for very long. My last oldest sibling is the extremely smart yet silly brother. He has this ability to make everyone in the room roar with laughter in seconds. He can make any situation into a funny one, and that is a true talent. He has this energy and smile and goodness to him that wears off onto everyone around him. I go to him when i'm in need of a good laugh for sure. When him and I were little we played this game called "Make me Laugh Three Times". You had to say or do the most silliest things to try and make the other person laugh a total of three times then it was the other's person turn to make you laugh. I could never ever make him laugh or even crack a smile, which is really embarrassing. I always gave up so it was basically always his turn to make me laugh, and I lost so fast every single time. We usually played it right before bed so I usually went to bed in a giggly mood. 

The point of all of this is every person is so vital in a family and I wished everyone realized that. Although your family may all be under one roof doesn't mean you're all the same. Everyone has their own personality and talents to bring to the family. We're all different and that's such a beautiful thing. Sometimes that can cause conflict, but different personalities in the family can help resolve those issues and move past those problems. I've learned that conflict and contention are two different things. Conflict is actually healthy as it is a natural thing and can bring different perspectives to the same issue and can bring broader, more valuable ideas to the table. Issues don't have to result in hard feelings. Conflict just means we all have a different way of doing things and making decisions. It's just another thing to deal with maturely, especially with family members. I have had plenty of conflicts with my family members over the years, and I wish I had dealt with it differently. I was stubborn and only looked at how the issue was hurting me. If I had just had a conversation about how the issue was affecting the other person, I could've avoided a lot of resentment towards the other. So if there's one take away from this post it would be to realize the different personalities of your family and figure out how to adjust your relationship with each of them and understand their perspectives on issues. That could save a lot of time and heartache. 

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